hmmm

...You Don't Know The Truth...You Can't Handle The Truth...

have you ever felt like you have had an idea, but you just don't know what it was? like...it was almost there, but you were just a smidge away from grasping the idea. that's how i feel. i just don't know what to grasp onto anymore. my hands are cold. i'm shaking and sweaty. my hearts pounding. i keep on sighing.
what does it all mean?
i can't decipher between my dreams and reality. i'm stuck in a whirl pool and can't get out. i'm stuck. i'm suffocating myself with my thoughts and stupid, STUPID doubts. i'm stuck. fuuuuuuuuuuckkkkk. i'm bored. i'm stuck. and nervous. i'm stuck. what for? i'm stuck? who the fuck knows. i feel sick. need to puke. want to puke. *sigh* need to cry, but can't. holding it inside isn't helping either. tonight's going to suck......................................
tears of joy, pain, love, lost. i can't take it, can't handle it anymore. i'm driving myself insane. need to do something. need to get away. need to run away. if i don't get help soon i'm going to crumble. i need to free my mind...i need to get out.